


39. Don't Cry

by Vocachuuu



Series: 100 Ways To Say I Love You Challenge [1]
Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: 100 Ways to Say I Love You Writing Challenge, Angst, Comfort/Angst, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda?, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, NDRV3 Chapter 1 Spoilers, Unrequited Crush, i dont know how to tag!!!! saihara is just a sad boy ok, i enjoy writing saihara-centric fics, kaede is...mentioned, other than that tho its spoil free, ouma loves saihara so much...but saihara is fucking oblivious, technically.. because saihara doesnt RLLY know how he feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-21 23:09:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13153974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vocachuuu/pseuds/Vocachuuu
Summary: Ouma can't understand how Saihara became so easily attached to Akamatsu. But that wouldn't stop him from comforting the mourning boy.





	39. Don't Cry

**Author's Note:**

> this was requested on my twitter! i wrote this really quickly... i was excited to write (and actually finish!!!) a saiouma fic LOL.... when will i actually finish all 20 my saiouma works rip... anyways i hope you guys enjoy!!!

Standing in Akamatsu’s talent lab felt bittersweet. The soothing rhythm of  _ Claire de Lune  _ was only relaxing when he closed his mind and imagined Akamatsu sitting at the piano, playing each note with a soft smile on her face. The room itself was warm, yet the lack of another human by Saihara’s side made it feel oddly cold. Knowing he was in a room that she would have adored made him feel at ease; yet whenever he opened his eyes, the unbearable weight of reality returned, feeling heavier each time.

 

He pulled his hat down far enough to block his sight before allowing his arms to fall lifelessly at his sides. Shoulders tense, he dug his nails into his palm, breathing out a shaky sigh before nodding to himself. Coming to a tentative conclusion, he stepped towards the source of the playing music and shut it off with a shaky hand. 

 

_ I can’t let this hold me back,  _ he told himself, hoping to heighten his mood at least a little. It didn’t work in the slightest, and it was impossible to pretend it did. Defeated, Saihara turned away from the sole reminder of the one person he felt he could trust, and left off to his room.

 

He felt sluggish. His feet were dragging against the ground, and his eyes were only partially focused on each step he took. It felt like the trial had drained the life from him; all he wanted to do was pass out into a deep sleep and never wake up. What was there to look forward to in a life like this? What was there to live for? Why live a life bearing the weight of these memories? Surely it would only get worse from here on—

 

“Sai-ha-ra-chaaan~! Kinda suspicious, walking around this late all by your lonesome… Isn’t that right?”

 

It was no question who had caught him, just as he opened the doors leading out of the school. Swallowing thickly, he tried to block out any negative thoughts as he looked up at Ouma tiredly.

 

“I think it’s more concerning that  _ you’re  _ out so late,” he pointed out, hoping he didn’t seem immensely different than usual. The last thing he wanted was for Ouma to actually suspect him of doing something - unlikely, considering everyone was aware of how affected Saihara was by Akamatsu’s death, but not impossible. It was best to keep all possibilities in mind when facing someone such as Ouma. “Ah, wait… What time is it, exactly?”

 

“Hmm… I’d say almost four in the morning,” Ouma hummed, and Saihara briefly went into a panic. Before he could respond, however, a rather predictable claim came from the Supreme Leader; “oh, but that’s a lie! It’s just barely twelve, so don’t worry your pretty little head! Saihara-chan will still get his beauty sleep~”

 

All Saihara could do was sigh. His mind was way too clouded and his entire being was way too tired to deal with Ouma, especially at this time.

 

“Th...Thank you, Ouma-kun,” was all he got out, rubbing his eyes. “I’m sorry, but… I-I think I should really get to my room.”

 

“Saihara-chan… You’re kind of boring, you know that? You were a lot more interesting during the trial, when you were chewing out Akamatsu-chan! Why do you change from interesting to boring so quickly?”

 

Saihara tried to take another breath. His chest felt so constricted,  _ why is it so hard to breathe?  _ He tried to stand straight and walk past Ouma, wanting nothing more than to get in his room.

 

“Ouma-kun, please… Let’s talk tomorrow.” It was embarrassing to beg (even though he and Akamatsu had literally gotten on their knees for Iruma not too long ago), and Saihara deeply wished he could just vanish out of existence. He was already walking away after the words left his mouth, carelessly assuming that Ouma would just give up after such a curt goodbye. Footsteps followed behind him, and he cursed the smaller for being so goddamn  _ insistent. _

 

“Saihara-chan?” He called, not too far behind. Saihara was at the entrance to the dorms - so close,  _ so close—  _

 

But a hand reached up and grabbed his shoulder, pulling him back. It was a light tug, but Saihara had lost any will to try and fight back, so he was easily put off balance. Stumbling, he managed to stay on his feet, and with a quiet exasperated sigh, he faced Ouma with eyes casted downwards. “Yes, Ouma-kun?”

 

“Are you crying?” The purple-headed male asked all-too casually, tilting his head to look at Saihara from under his hat. The detective’s hands flew to his face, making contact with his tear-streaked cheeks. 

 

“Ouma-kun,  _ please,  _ I just—” Saihara tried to give some, any response, yet he was too choked up to try. Though it was fruitless, he still wiped at his dampened eyes. “I-I’m sorry, this is the second time you’ve had to see me look so pathetic, I—”

 

“Jeez, does Saihara-chan think I’m a totally heartless prick? Even evil supreme leaders can understand human emotions. It’s not like I’m an emotionless scrap of metal like Kiiboy!” He carelessly glanced down towards his hand, picking at his fingernails. “It was a little stupid of you to get attached to Akamatsu like that. But you did, and you can’t go and change that feeling just because she’s dead.”

 

Saihara quivered silently before Ouma, letting out a few silent sobs before allowing himself to break his guard. He all but collapsed onto the smaller male, who let out a surprised  _ “oh,”  _ but still didn’t show defiance otherwise. Saihara held the smaller close - holding someone was so comforting, even if they were someone like Ouma - and buried his head in the crook of his neck, letting out all the pain he tried so hard to repress. After a few seconds, Ouma returned the hug, standing on his toes to help prevent the taller from hurting his back or anything. 

 

“S-Saihara-chan… Don’t cry,” Ouma whispered, but he only sobbed harder. A few seconds passed of just that; Ouma and Saihara standing out in the silence of the night, the only sound being Ouma’s tender  _ its okay _ s and  _ calm down _ s murmured into his ear.

 

Saihara didn’t know Ouma incredibly well, but he hadn’t expected the boy to have a side of him that was so… Gentle. The Ouma he knew was energetic, loud, and blunt. It was as if the Ouma he held was a completely different person.

 

“O-Ouma-kun?” He called out in a quiet voice. His voice was slightly muffled by Ouma’s scarf, but still audible.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Thank you. I’m sorry.”

 

Ouma lightly pushed Saihara away, just enough to that they could actually see one another. While keeping one arm securely around Saihara, the other was brought up to his face, wiping his tears with a small, pale thumb. 

 

“Don’t be. Anything for my  _ beloved  _ Saihara-chan,” Ouma cooed, giving a small smirk. Saihara stumbled over words; it was in that moment, sitting outside the dorms in the middle of the night with Ouma in his arms and staring right through him with amethyst eyes, that he realized how  _ perfect  _ Ouma was. Well - obviously Saihara had already known how unfairly attractive he was. Yet it just hit Saihara that Ouma, in all his mystery, was still a human with emotions. He wasn’t heartless, he didn’t enjoy seeing others suffer— 

 

“A-ah! Ouma-kun, I’m s-so sorry!” Saihara snapped from whatever daze he was in, staggering back away from the other. Ouma looked genuinely shocked for a moment, hands falling at his sides almost lifelessly after Saihara backed away. 

 

“I really… Liked being held by you,” Ouma murmured, his voice soft. The ravenette blinked, taking a step closer again. 

 

“O-Ouma-kun…?”

 

“But that’s a lie!” He exclaimed, expression immediately reverting to his regular grin. “Nishishi! I’m not that creepy, Saihara-chan.”

 

Saihara could only muster a laugh, adjusting his askew hat and smiling at Ouma. He didn’t have the energy to consider whether it  _ was _ a lie or not. “Whatever you say. Thank you.”

 

“No problemo! Do you think you can survive the night without me? I’m great company at night, you know!” Punctuated with a small wink and a chortle, Ouma asked if Saihara needed overnight company in the only way he knew how; joking around. Saihara understood this, and shook his head, a small smile still on his lips.

 

“I think I’ll be alright. Goodnight, Ouma-kun.”

 

“Okie dokie! Don’t let the bed bugs bite, Saihara-chan!”

 

They didn’t need to speak to come to a silent agreement; do not let anyone know what happened that night. 

**Author's Note:**

> twitter: @hanayagay


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